Sammy design (which I will never be able to draw again...) Decapitated Sammy...I'm 3D! His body won't be done tonight as I forgot to buy wire cutters but basically I'm gonna stick to the photo and puppets idea I had in the first draft but make clay people to replace the stick cut out guys. I'll be stitching together some real clothes for them too to give a bit more depth and texture. This may work out better that I thought. :) The biggest problem is that he doesn't really look enough in clay mode like a kid. Maybe a body and clothes will help with that, though. </p>

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

So I think I should just forget about trying to find a literary agent to get my book published and instead just forward the story to all of the fourth grade classes in the state. Why? Because this year, it seems that it will be used once again for alliteration teaching purposes. At possibly two different schools no less. The teacher who had me come in last year asked me for a repeat performance when her students get to that chapter--I guess it really helped the kids learn and they talked about it for the rest of the year, ha. I also got a call from my dad this evening informing me that his girlfriend's daughter, Erica (who for some reason loves the book) showed the story to her teacher who asked for my contact information to do a reading for her class.

While putting this information into my letters for literary agents hasn't really gotten me any bites, it is nice to know that my work is appreciated. It's also been great motivation for reworking the illustrations. I've been pretty much living at the craft store the past couple days getting supplies and I think I finally know what I'm going to do and how to get it to work it's just going to be a long process. But it's going to involve little to no drawing (which I suck at) and lots and lots of crafts (which I'm moderately good at) so we'll see how it goes. I have faith that it will turn out well.

But yeah. More chances to warp young minds. I'm excited, ha.

Illustration idea:

How much would it be considered to be cheating if I took photos like my original illustrations were but then used paper cut out and collages over the photo? Like, use a photo of a couch as a template for a cut out paper version of a couch. Is that horrible artistic cheating that would completely negate any illustration work I can do on my book?

...I really should just suck it up and pay someone to do it. Bah.

Why do all of my first person stories have male protagonists and all of my third person ones star females?

Does anyone else find that odd?

That said, I'm having a hard time finding a voice for this one. It's driving me a little batty. :-/

I have this problem where I start to write and then my brain keeps talking but my fingers stop typing and I end up telling myself the story/scene instead of writing it down and then I get distracted by some random web page thing that I'm just drawn to click on on my bookmarks even though I know I'm not going to read it, just click and click and click and anything, it seems, to get away from the task at hand, which is writing the goddamned story.

Christ on a cracker.

My head hurts.

So this is the revised version of this story. The general consensus from various editors that I sent it to was "very pretty, but what's the plot?" So I made some revisions in hope that I can make things a bit clearer and still keep the vague and slightly poetic imagery. I'm not sure how well I did, but feedback would be greatly appreciated. I feel like I should do a bit more revising before resubmitting this piece, so any insight I could get would be awesome. :)


( The gray metal doors slid open, revealing their artificial Eden. Silently, they entered, their feet sinking into cool, lush, grass, toes lost within the soft blades. Each felt they should be naked, relishing the warmth of their created sun, the cool summer air, pumped in from the environmental control units, conditioned to smell of sweet fruit and clean water. Nearly fifty years of laboratory specimens and piecing back together fragments of genetic coding. Fifty years of decoding corroded computer entries, of failed replications, poison gasses, rotting matter, all for this moment, this masterpiece. )

Not sure who I love more: Evan, or his subconsious, ha.

(from text)

Evan: I had a dream last night that you got a book published.
Me: Aww, what a nice dream! Was it successful?
Evan: Must'v been cuz there was a movie in the works. It was about that topic from that contest that you thought was dumb.


Now let's hope he has prophetic dreams, ha.


On a related note, the contest is from Good Housekeeping. The assignment is to write a short fiction piece on the topic they gave and grand prize is $3000 and (possible) publication. Two runners up get, I think, $750 and also (possible) publication.

The topic? "The lives of women today".

??!?!

How the hell does one write a short fiction piece on the lived of women today. An essay perhaps, but a short story? And with such a general topic? *dies* I figure if nothing else I'll rework the bartender piece I wrote for TDM a long time ago and mix it up with some snarky humor and see where it goes. I don't really know much about the lives of women--there are so many of them. Sarcastic bartender outside of her element? I can swing that. Prolly not what they want, and I doubt that out of the myrad of talented writers who will be submitting I'll win, but what the hell.

For others writers reading this, here is the contest infomation: http://www.goodhousekeeping.com/family/real/short-story-contest

Alright. Queries sent to three more agencies. Have the addresses of two more who only accept snail mail submissions which means that I need to go buy some envelopes.

Aaaaannnnddd a rejection. They were quick to pass. Bah. Seeing how few and far between literary agents who support children's books are (they all love YA novels, but actual children's books not so much), this is gonna be a long and sucky process. Maybe I should just suck it up and work on this YA novel I have in my head and just give up on the children's book angle. Or self publish. Because that's not the saddest thing in the world at all. Damn. :-/

I just submitted a query letter to a literary agency. I'll find out in 2-5 days if they want to read the manuscript. I think I'm gonna throw up.

Hey look! My other story is up!
Click here to check it out! Yay!

The formatting is still off. Maybe that's just common practice for online journals. Whatever the case, it's up and I never did sign a contact and/or get paid (though that is supposed to happen in the next 60 days--the payment part, that is. I would think I would have signed a contract before publication...) so I need to email the editor about that, but still. Yay! It's up! Hoorah.

Yet another god damned rejection. I should just accept my utter failure at existing. My only published work is in a freaking nonpaying market, the one that is supposed to be published next is supposed to come out next week and I haven't even gotten a damned contract for it, so I highly doubt That's going through and now every story I did have out has been returned to me with friendly little notes saying "this was really well written But" or "you have a really good handle on description But" or some other such nonsense. Basically they all boil down to "You're not good enough of a writer for us to accept" because if I were? They would freaking pay me for my stuff already and stop with the platitudes.

/rant.

YAY!!! My first ever published story is up!!!

http://www.vagabondagepress.com

The story is called "Ugly Things", and it's listed under Short Stories.

I also got mentioned in the Letter from the Editor (as did all the other authors, but still, ha).

This just made my day. :)

PS: I'm kind of not too fond of the layout, if only because they didn't put extra spaces in between scenes which makes it a bit hard to read. Bother. Ah well. :)

Another rejection. Bah.

Though your essay "That's Not Really Funny" was at times gripping and emotive, we are currently not able to accept it for publication.

I hate rejection letters like that. I just want to write them back to say "Why?! If it's gripping and emotive, then why can't you accept it? Huh? ANSWER ME!!!"

Grrr.

I'm toying with the idea of cutting my hair back to a pixi cut again. As much as I want to grow it out really long again, doing so means that it's in my face more often, which annoys the crap out of me. Plus I know that doing so will, at least temporarially, help with this goddamn anxiety. However, I'm also going to two weddings this summer and I'm not sure how good a pixi cut looks while wearing a dress...because I've never worn a dress when I've had my hair that short before.

I need to just stop thinking. Really, all I do is just make myself crazy.

Harshest rejection, yet (though possibly with the best advice I suppose).

In regard to this story:

Thank you for your submission to the journal. At this time, it does not meet our needs. I guess I have to ask, where IS the story? This reads like a snippet of a larger work. But there is no actual plot, only the hint of one. There is no character development, but rather the implication that there is some that we missed. There is a lot implied, but nothing ever stated. It's like I'm reading someone's half-remembered dream. Beautifully described, to be sure, but in the end describing nothing.

You have an excellent ear for word choice and diction. But perhaps you are trying to be too subtle with your plot and as such have forgotten to actually include it with the story.

Ouch. Gah.

*dies*

I have no idea why my work feels the need to be so freaking Cold. It's almost 70 degrees outside and they have the AC on to 50 something. Ridiculous. I suppose it isn't as bad on the floor because there's more space for the air to fill, but back in my little office? My lips are literally blue. Ugh. I find it a bit odd that I'm wearing four layers and still think that I could use a space heater. -_- It's just going to get worse, too. Stupid AC.


I'm toying with the idea of sending a query letter to one of the magazines I submitted to. Their site says that it's okay to do so after six weeks (which it has been, though not by much), and according to Duotrope they've responded to pieces that were sent just a week or so ago, which, of course, makes me a nervous nurotic mess. I know that the longer I wait the better chance of acceptance I have, as that means that they're at least reading and considering it, but I hate waiting all this time just for a rejection letter. However, I don't want to query and seem too pushy, either. Bah. I hate this game.

I have decided, however, to focus on writing humor pieces if my brain decides to cooperate. The two acceptances that I've had have both been humor pieces and those who have read my stuff say that they enjoy those better than the dark, angsty or horror stuff. Personally, I enjoy writing that kind of material better, although I do tend to worry if what I think is funny is actually funny to anyone else. Gah.


I took Evan's nephew to t-ball practice yesterday. There is nothing funnier than watching someone try to get twenty 5 year olds to work together as a team. They're like little monkeys. It was hilarious.

Best exchanges of the hour:

Coach: Come on guys, don't run away from the ball! It's not going to hurt if it hits you, I promise.
Random Kid: Remember that time I got hit in the face? That hurt!

*Evan's nephew scoops up a ball that bounced into his chest*
Coach: See? You got it! That didn't hurt at all, did it?
Nephew: *makes an inch mark with his thumb and forefinger* It did a little bit.

Joined the gym where Evan does massage, yesterday. Hopefully I get get up (and keep up) some kind of three times a week schedule, but I'm not sure how that will last. I'm also attempting to alter my diet to eat healthier, which is...almost working. It's a bit harder than I expected it to be this time around due to the fact that it's not just me who eats the food that is bought. Evan and I make a point to eat dinner together every night, so it kind of feels wrong to limit entrees that he likes just because I'm trying to diet. I suppose I should just limit my portions when we have things like burgers and such. He did make an effort for me (as he did the shopping this week) and got all wheat products, and lean/organic meat, and random low fat/light stuff, so that was nice of him.

I do need to lose this weight, though. I know that it's not a whole lot, but it's more than my limited body image can deal with--expecially now that I'm on this BC and feel like a bloated whale monster a good portion of the time (though it's starting to even out so I feel a bit better). I would like my clothes to fit again. It would be wonderful, especially as it's starting to get warmer and I can't just hide in sweaters. I love tanktops and tshirts and want to be able to wear them without feeling like my gut is hanging out.


Man, I was going to say something else, and now I've forgotten what it was. Man I'm getting old, ha. Ah well, I gotta get back to work anyhow. My lunch break is way too short.

Whee! I sold another story--the rewrite request I had last month accepted the revisions. I am full of excitement. It's another online journal, but it's something. It will also be out in June, which is fun--both my stories that are being published out in the same month, ha.

Man oh man am I glad to be home. Vacation was awesome and was definitely needed, but there is nothing better than your own comfy bed.

Back to the grind first thing tomorrow. Work at 8, and then an Algebra exam, then I get to come home and get my term paper finished for Women's Psyche, which is due at midnight, and study for my Human Sexuality exam the next day. Bah. I didn't hear anything from my manager all week so I'm not sure if the auditor came or not....I almost hope she did, just so that I don't have to worry about that on top of all of the back paperwork and things that I'm going to have to deal with, but I also kind of hope she didn't because, well...back paperwork and things. Someone was supposed to be keeping up with everything while I was gone...I really hope they did. I also hope that my manager found some way to talk our district manager into letting me upgrade me phone early so that I have an iPhone waiting for me when I get back. That would be fan-tastic.

I'll put up the rest of our vacation pics up later this week. Right now I'm gonna go snuggle up in my bed with my kitties and boyfriend and get some sleep.

New story for the latest challenge over at prosechallenge.


( When I come back from the hospital, no one knows me. It’s better that way.  )